BUY A VOLCANO

Premium dormant and active volcanoes. Financing available.

Available Inventory

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Mount Fluffmore

Dormant. 12,000 ft. Includes mineral rights and 3 adjacent timelines.

$47,000,000

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The Angry Alpaca

Active. Lava flows every Tuesday. Great for geothermal startups.

$89,000,000

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Diamond Crater

Extinct. Filled with quantum crystals. Perfect for secret lairs.

$120,000,000

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Cloud Peak

Submarine volcano. Currently underwater in most timelines.

$33,000,000

Why Buy From Us?

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Clear Title

We legally own these volcanoes in at least 3 concurrent realities.

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Maintenance Included

Free lava flow calibration and tectonic plate alignment for 10 years.

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Delivery

We can relocate your volcano to any continent. Extra charge for Mars.

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Financing

0% APR for qualified buyers. Payment accepted in gold, souls, or Bitcoin.

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